What is respect?
- Thread starter skribs
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Respect is something that you have to earn it.
Respect is when you think someone is genuinely good, in whatever way you view the word good. But, my response (and this may be my work as a therapist bleeding into real life), would be to explore more the WHY of her question. What's going on that she's questioning who she should respect? Is there someone she's being told to respect that she shouldn't? What does she think respecting someone means? Who does she respect most, and what are the qualities of that person that she respects? Based on those qualities, how would she define the word, and who else should she respect? I think a lot more could be done for her by exploring what resulted in that question, then by giving any answer I can think of. For people in general, but especially children, if they figure out the answer to their own questions, it has a lot more meaning.
hoshin1600
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I think your reading too much into it. This was asked by a 7yo in a martial arts class were she is constantly told to respect the teachers, flag, school, their partner, the dojo floor, the style founders....ect.
There are a heck of a lot of words adults direct at kids but never explain what they mean.
Something or someone has your respect when you treat them with kindness, as though they have value to you.
You can go on to give examples of parents having value because they love and care for the child and thus she wouldn't want them to be upset by how she/he treats them... Etc etc
You can go on to give examples of parents having value because they love and care for the child and thus she wouldn't want them to be upset by how she/he treats them... Etc etc
now disabled
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I'd add that also respect in an eastern sense is different to a western sense and to a kid that might not make sense or indeed may impact in a negative way. We (imo) use a word that has not many meanings or definitions (not every word lol) but in the east one word or better still the Character (Kanji or the equivalent) can mean many different things
Hmm great question!
An intangible quality which is hard to describe.. but I would say (to the 7 year old): that it's of way of looking at people and treating them with kindness and care that you would want too. Respect is admiring someone's skill and being open to learning from them. And a way of accepting that other people may have different thoughts than you and to be okay with that.
(Trying to frame it in simpler terms, tricky!)
An intangible quality which is hard to describe.. but I would say (to the 7 year old): that it's of way of looking at people and treating them with kindness and care that you would want too. Respect is admiring someone's skill and being open to learning from them. And a way of accepting that other people may have different thoughts than you and to be okay with that.
(Trying to frame it in simpler terms, tricky!)
EddieCyrax
Blue Belt
Awesome question. Here is my response for consideration:
Respect is the realization that individuals have experiences and information that you can learn from to make you a better or more rounded person. To give someone respect is to treat them with openness to allow you to learn.
Respect is lost when an individual's experiences/information is used to hurt/damage/control purposes.
Respect is the realization that individuals have experiences and information that you can learn from to make you a better or more rounded person. To give someone respect is to treat them with openness to allow you to learn.
Respect is lost when an individual's experiences/information is used to hurt/damage/control purposes.
noun
- 1.
a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.
verb
- 1.
admire (someone or something) deeply, as a result of their abilities, qualities, or achievements.
That is common courtesy
You should give common courtesy freely but people should earn respect.
I agree partly, the two are intertwined - I afford everyone respect and courtesy until or unless they give me a reason not to.
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skribs
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We show respect to everyone at our school. Even to the kids that are misbehaving so bad I literally have to carry them off the mat, I still have to do so respectfully.
I think what I'm getting (and what I can explain to this girl) is respect is a way to show someone that they're important. "Value" might be too abstract a concept at that age.
Danny T
Senior Master
For our Kids we define Respect as:
- having a special feeling of liking a person or thing.
- to show special attention and courtesy toward them because of your liking.
For instance we have a special feeling toward our parents and because of that we then to show special attention to them. We do our best to do or say good and often special things for them as they do for us. That is because we 'respect' each other.
We show respect to the flag of our country, we show respect to our school, to our teachers, and to each other. We say things like 'yes sir or ma'am', 'please and thank you' as examples of respect to each other.
If you respect everyone without reason....then respect is worthless.
People confuse treating people with courtesy and decency as respect.
Respect is due to admiration. Without admiration it is meaningless. You should earn respect not be entitled to it.
People confuse treating people with courtesy and decency as respect.
Respect is due to admiration. Without admiration it is meaningless. You should earn respect not be entitled to it.
I think the common usages of the word invoke both definitions. After all, to be discourteous is also to be disrespectful.
Danny T
Senior Master
I think respect is to be shown until one shows one is not worthy of it.
I disagree.
I think common courtesy, civility, and politeness should be shown to people. But respect is earned based on their actions. That's what makes respect meaningful...it isn't given freely....you have to earn it. It is admiration and honor for your actions.
I try and teach my son that he is not entitled to respect....it is his obligation to conduct himself in a manner to earn peoples respect and when he earns that respect it is more meaningful.
Respect is also given to offices, entities, and objects of symbolic significance. As such you may feel respect towards someone you do not yet know personally because of the office or position they hold and have earned. So, you may rightly show respect towards a teacher, commanding officer, sensei, etc. by virtue of their earned position, respect that goes beyond routine courtesy shown to any stranger. Similarly, you may treat inanimate objects with signs of respect such as your nation's flag, a holy book such as the Torah, Bible or Koran, etc. This describes the respect we may give to symbols of our martial arts, such as out belts, the dojo, dojang, or kwoon, and so on.
Showing respect is another thing. This refers to the culturally defined ways we symbolically demonstrate respect and bestow honor.
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Danny T
Senior Master
Okay you disagree.
What does courtesy mean??
: behavior marked by polished manners or respect for others
: respectful behavior
: a courteous and respectful act or expression
Courtesy is being respectful and one cannot be respectful without some sense of respect.
Basic respect for other human beings isn't something that needs to be earned. I don't believe you are disrespectful to people you come into contact with until they earn your being respectful.
