This time TKD can't help me

[Manny]

Dear All, the last 10 days have been terribles for me, the family bussiness is broke and have debts to pay, the work is very low, in fact the bussiness stoped on october and november was dead about bussiness talking.

I feel no shame telling you I've been crying a lot, and I don't know what to do, my wife already knows the bussiness/financial situation but my girls don't, I am trying to get close to church and Jesus but sometimes I feel so helpless.

I am not going to dojang since mid novemeber, I just think I can break on tears and don't want the boys see me crying, I am like a zombi, walking deep in my toughts and not paying atention to any one.

I am desesperate, so please pray for me.

Manny

 

[granfire]

Manny, my prayers are with you.

but there is no shame in letting people know.

It does not make you any less of a man.
Things have been tough all around everywhere.

I am sure your girls will understand when you explain it to them. They know you tried your best.

 

[Carol]

Agree with what Granfire said. Good thoughts and prayers for you, and I hope better days are coming soon.

 

[IcemanSK]

You are in my prayers, Manny. You are not alone. There are many people who care about you!

 

[sopraisso]

Dear Manny,
I believe in life most problems -- if not all -- are temporary, and yours must be the case, too. When the situation is too bad, it's really hard for us to remember there will be a light in the end of the tunnel. Many times we don't see it, but in the right time it shows up.
If you have to stop going to the dojang for now, you must do what you have to do.
I'm sure your little girls will also be strong now, and stronger later. Problems are part of life even when we're children, and you must know those experiences build a lot in character.
Anyway, remember you haven't lost what's most important in a man's life -- you haven't lost your family. Be very close to them and things will become better. You will support each other and together you will find a solution.
You and your family will deal with this hard situation, my friend.
My prayers and my best feelings are with you.

 

[MAist25]

Manny, keep your head up buddy. Things may be hard but you must keep hope. Remember, one of the Taekwondo tenants is indomitable spirit and you have to keep moving forward and do the best that you can. My prayers are with you for sure, God has a reason for everything!

 

[Tez3]

What children want is the love of their parents, and I'm sure yours have plenty of that, children are hugely resilent in times of trouble and they will amaze you with their strength...which you gave them. Children will pull together in the family and you will find they will be proud you trusted them, they will find ways to help and you will get through this.
Old Jewish saying which is very true 'this too will pass', it will, trust me, my people have a history of 'bad times' but the secret is to never give up, don't look for the light at the end of the tunnel. You aren't alone, you have friends around the world, we are thinking of you, as we say in England 'Chin up!'

If you can post up what your family business is and we can all put our heads together and brainstorm to see if we can find ways for you to get more business etc, there must be a lot of different talents among us, surely we can come up with ideas for you to try or things that have worked where we are.

 

[ATC]

Hang in there Manny. Been there myself a few times. Keep positive and keep working to solve your issues. Whatever you do, just don't give up. Giving up is when you will make things even worse. Look down deep and know that you have skill sets and talent that you can use to make money if that is what you need. At this point you cannot be nice. Be resepectful but remember your time and help is worth something and that you need to be paid at this point for any help you give or do.

I use to give away my time and money by being the nice guy that would do anything for anyone for nothing in return. Well when times got tough I kept my same niceness but always let people know that I would be happy to help out. I would ask them how much did they think the job was worth and then when they gave me the answer I would then say OK I do it for the price that they stated. They got work done and I got paid without feeling bad for taking money from friends or people I know. Just remember you have to do what you have to do. Once you do something like this you never know what can open up for you. I got my current job this way as the person I did some work for knew a guy that need someone with my skill set. I was back on my feet and out of the big finacial hole that was dug in a years time.

So again Manny, Do not give up and do nothing. Keep fighting and do all that you can. It will be hard but only for a little while. I have a wife and kids and they depend on me so I do what I have to do to make sure that they keep a roof over head, and food on the table. Money comes and goes so don't let that bother you. I have had hundreds of thousands in the bank only to see it all go away then make it back again. So keep your head up and stay positive.

Just some friendly advice from someone that has been there.

 

[Master Dan]

What children want is the love of their parents, and I'm sure yours have plenty of that, children are hugely resilent in times of trouble and they will amaze you with their strength...which you gave them. Children will pull together in the family and you will find they will be proud you trusted them, they will find ways to help and you will get through this.
Old Jewish saying which is very true 'this too will pass', it will, trust me, my people have a history of 'bad times' but the secret is to never give up, don't look for the light at the end of the tunnel. You aren't alone, you have friends around the world, we are thinking of you, as we say in England 'Chin up!'

If you can post up what your family business is and we can all put our heads together and brainstorm to see if we can find ways for you to get more business etc, there must be a lot of different talents among us, surely we can come up with ideas for you to try or things that have worked where we are.

Manny as we talked before I agree with this post there are alot of smart people on this forum and if you let us know what the business is its possible we all could come up with something that might help. However TKD can help becasue the basic premise of TKD is not about perseverence through good times or just wining but its about getting back up as long as your breathing you have posibilities. The best marketing people in the US taught me a term in business as long as they have not killed you and eaten you your ok. Your kids will love you even more by sharing with them and letting them help in any way. This is a time for you to consider what potential good thing for others were you about to accomplish before everything went bad and acknowledge the negative side is not going to win try to figure out what you are to learn from this its when we are the weakest and down the lowest we accomplish some of our best work. Our family will keep you in our prayers and do what we can if we can.

 

[Cyriacus]

I believe this is called being stuck in a rut.
Best wishes Manny - And if ever You feel like Youre gonna cry for it, just remind Yourself, that for all You dont have, You have so much. And Fighting for what You want is better than missing having it. Most do this at some point - And replacing the Depressive part with ANYTHING else is best. It keeps You focused.

 

[ralphmcpherson]

Good luck with everything Manny. Hang in there and stay strong for those you love. You are in our thoughts and prayers.

 

[dancingalone]

Positive thoughts headed your way, Manny. If you need to talk, complain, or get anything off your chest, you know we're here to listen.

 

[chrispillertkd]

God is often last minute, but he is never late.

Pax,

Chris

 

[Gwai Lo Dan]

Sorry to hear of your troubles. I don't know if you will be able to laugh, but I liked this episode of Everybody Loves Raymond is maybe similar to your problems.

The 2 sons complain that their father was never loving, and always criticized them (at about 15 minutes in the clip). So that cannot understand how another young man enjoyed spending time with their father and looked at him as a mentor. The punchline is at about 19 minutes.

http://www.videozer.com/video/ZSl882

 

[Thesemindz]

Good luck brother. Things are bad around here too. My wife and I lost our home last christmas, my brother lost his a few months earlier, the economy is completely stagnant so we aren't making any money, we're all covered in debt we incurred ten years ago when we were making money, businesses are closing everywhere and people I know are losing their cars/homes/jobs all the time. It's bad. Really, really bad. And we've all been crying. It happens. There's nothing to be ashamed about.

I am praying for you. Keep moving forward. Even if you lose everything, you will wake up the next day and have to move on. When we lost our home, which happened literally overnight, it felt like someone had cut my heart out of my chest. I was in shock for months. It helped us struggle forward because we were so dead inside, but it was like walking in a dream. I understand when you say you are like a zombie. I've been there. I understand struggling to take care of your family, and how it makes you feel as a man when you can't. I've been there. It's hard.

There aren't any easy answers or promises. I wish there were. Try not to let go of your karate. There really is something there that will help you keep moving when things are bad. I'm so sorry you're struggling. But what I've learned is even when it feels like it should kill you, it doesn't. You keep waking up, even when you're hurting. So keep moving man. Things will change. Maybe not for the better, but your situation won't stay this way forever. It'll pass.

Good luck bro. Hold on to those kids. I was raised poor, but I was raised with love, and I had the best childhood I could ever imagine. I'm sure it's hard, I don't have any kids of my own yet, but I know that as one I didn't really understand why we were poor or how bad things were. I just knew my mom and dad loved me. They still do. That's what you can do for your family, even if everything else is taken away.

I can see your heart man. I'm sure a lot of other people here see it too. You'll get through this eventually. Just keep swimming.


-Rob

 

[StudentCarl]

Everything worthwhile in life comes from struggle. This too will make you stronger my friend. Just like fighting, you keep moving and work to make an opening. It will come. Self-control is a fundamental of perseverence. Yes, your Taekwondo will help you through this.
Carl

 

[Daniel Sullivan]

Definitely will keep you and your family in prayer, Manny. If you can get to the dojang, try to do so. You need an outlet. TKD may not be able to solve your problem, but it can help you get through it.

Peace and blessings to you, my friend!

 

[terryl965]

Manny will keep you and the family in our blessings. Remember you are a strong man and you will rebound from this set back.

 

[Kong Soo Do]

My prayers are with you Manny.

 

[Manny]

Thank you Rob, my family is not a rich one either, we are a working family, we love each other so much, I love my brother and I know he's strugling like me to keep head cool and a strong heart. Today I will go out of my city, hitting the road with my dad, we are going to visit a hunter friend who is going to buy my hunting shotgun and my target semiauto pistol. I don't feel so bad about selling my treasures, they cost me a lot but if this sell allows me to feel better cause I will have the bread on table then I must feel happy.

I went to talk with my sambonim and he talked me strong and he asked me to stand up and fight to overcome this, at the begining I felt his words a little hard but then I realice he wanted me to overcome this, and yes I want to go to dojang and do some exercise and for an hour to do something to evade those bad feelings, but believe the only thing want to do afther work is to go home take a hot bath and go to see some tv and rest.

I will go to dojang tomorrow is possible and try to kick worrie's ***.

Manny