The wisdom of Larry the CableGuy

[Bigshadow]

1. A day without sunshine is like night.

2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese in the trap.

9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.

10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis ? Raise my hand.

14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines

19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What
the heck happened?"

22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall
off.

23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.

24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates . it's more like a jar of
jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

 

[CoryKS]

That's funny right there, I don't care who you are. :rofl:

 

[Shaderon]

Brilliant, and most of them are right on the money :lfao:

 

[IcemanSK]

That's funny right there, I don't care who you are. :rofl:

Yes, it is:ultracool

 

[tellner]

Yeah, he has some good lines - "The KY car has moved into pole position and easily slipped into the #2 hole". But the more I listen to him the more disgusted I become. The guy is the modern incarnation of minstrel shows and Dogpatch. He takes every nasty, dirty, bigoted prejudice against Southerners and embodies them in precisely the same style.

Ethnic humor is great. And it's an unhealthy group that can not laugh at itself. But this is a little different. Consider his partners in crime, Jeff Foxworthy and Bill Engvall. They certainly poke fun at the working and middle class South. But it's affectionate. The humor is self-deprecating as often as not. And it doesn't unrelentingly make Southerners out to be stupid, dirty, gullible, incestuous, lazy promiscuous drunks.

There's also the insider vs. outsider thing at work. Richard Pryor talked "******" for years. Well, until he went to Africa and said "I saw millions of Black people there, not one single ******." But he was a Black man looking at and holding a mirror up to his world warts and all. George Lopez, Myron Cohen, Mel Brooks, Russel Peters and the rest do the same thing. They hit the good and the bad. And they do it as insiders. "This is my world or at least a cartoon of it. You gotta laugh or you're gonna cry."

Now, suppose it were Lopez telling the Jewish jokes or Cohen going ****** this, ****** that. It wouldn't be nearly as funny. So what makes it better when it's poor and working class White people from the South who are constantly made fools of by an upper middle class lout from Nebraska and affected a fake exaggerated accent?

Note: I'm not a great fan of the South as a concept. In fact, my views get pretty close to this when I've been eating meat. That doesn't make his class and culture baiting any more palatable.

 

[Bigshadow]

Yeah, he has some good lines - "The KY car has moved into pole position and easily slipped into the #2 hole". But the more I listen to him the more disgusted I become. The guy is the modern incarnation of minstrel shows and Dogpatch. He takes every nasty, dirty, bigoted prejudice against Southerners and embodies them in precisely the same style.

Ethnic humor is great. And it's an unhealthy group that can not laugh at itself. But this is a little different. Consider his partners in crime, Jeff Foxworthy and Bill Engvall. They certainly poke fun at the working and middle class South. But it's affectionate. The humor is self-deprecating as often as not. And it doesn't unrelentingly make Southerners out to be stupid, dirty, gullible, incestuous, lazy promiscuous drunks.

There's also the insider vs. outsider thing at work. Richard Pryor talked "******" for years. Well, until he went to Africa and said "I saw millions of Black people there, not one single ******." But he was a Black man looking at and holding a mirror up to his world warts and all. George Lopez, Myron Cohen, Mel Brooks, Russel Peters and the rest do the same thing. They hit the good and the bad. And they do it as insiders. "This is my world or at least a cartoon of it. You gotta laugh or you're gonna cry."

Now, suppose it were Lopez telling the Jewish jokes or Cohen going ****** this, ****** that. It wouldn't be nearly as funny. So what makes it better when it's poor and working class White people from the South who are constantly made fools of by an upper middle class lout from Nebraska and affected a fake exaggerated accent?

Note: I'm not a great fan of the South as a concept. In fact, my views get pretty close to this when I've been eating meat. That doesn't make his class and culture baiting any more palatable.

Also cannot forget the insidious racial/blonde jokes that is innocently accepted nowadays.