Signs you need a TKD intervention

bugatabugata

bugatabugata

Orange Belt
Joined
Aug 10, 2011
Messages
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Location
Washington, DC
I'll start:

1) Your stop wearing short sleeves/skirts, because of all the random "mystery" bruising (and it's 90 degrees outside)
2) Your significant other is no longer welcome to office parties (see #1 above)
3) The pedicurist runs away screaming, as soon as you take your socks off
4) Your loved ones are making gentle suggestions that TKD has morphed from a favorite hobby into a second job and start sending you links to "Macrame Fun" and "Zen Horticulture"
5) You have the Mater's home number and he calls to nag you, whenever you miss/are late to practice
6) You have a recurrent dream, where you morph into a human pinata (it being Cinco de Mayo and whatnot :)
 
7) You close doors and draws with any of the four basic kicks from Tae Kwon Do.
8). When you sneeze your sneeze sound more like a Ki Ahp then a sneeze.
9). Your co workers at work look at you and wonder what the crap you are doing with that broom or mop.
 
10). You spend your spare time randomly stretching. Stretching in the parking lot, stretching at the bus stop...
 
11) You find yourself randomly changing stances while standing in line at the airport.
12) The fact that you constantly watch all the people around you results in then TSA pulling you out for "special attention" Every Single Time you fly.
13) "It's not abuse, it's part of his training" is the honest reason you give your kid bruises.
14) You're on a first name basis with the yard guys at the local concrete block shop, but you've never built anything.
 
15) You stop and perform your current pattern on the way to check the mail.
16) You're more upset that you misjudged your side kick distance than you are that you have to pay for a new handle for your fridge.
17) You stop to kick your heavy bag a few times with arms full of groceries.
 
18) People waiting for an elevator have had the doors open to reveal you, practicing your sidekick in the nice mirror in there.
19) You can't shake hands with people at work without bringing your feet together.
20) Getting from the living room to the kitchen is an agility exercise
21) Your trouser legs are too narrow at the top due to your specialist muscle development
22) You buy clothes based on how well you can move in them, not how well they fit
23) You own a copy of 'Korean for Dummies'
24) You think box jumps are 'fun'
25) Your mealtimes are different to everyone else's
 
Gnarlie said:
19) You can't shake hands with people at work without bringing your feet together.
Click to expand...
26) When You shake hands with someone, You often reflexively lock Their wrist, throw Them to the ground, and prepare to punch Their head, or stomp on Them.
 
27) You randomly bow coming into or out of a room or building without thinking (happened a lot to me back in the 80's, when I was an elementary schooler, especially since our dojang at the time was run out of the elementary school gymnasium)
28) If you find yourself in a physically traumatic event that results in shock outside of the dojang, you still manage to address the EMT's, nurses, and doctors Sir and Maam, because you associate pain with TKD.
 
28) Your pajamas resembles a dobok.
29) When you're startled you jump into fightin stance.
30) You find yourself always referring back to old Kung Fu flicks.
31) When you leave your friends you say "ahnyonghee gyesayo."
 
28) When watching martial arts movies you start to look at there techniques and start to grumble when you notice them doing it wrong.
29) Your most comfortable pairs of pants that you use to sleep in are your do bak pants. ( I'll admit this one plus sometimes to lazy to change as well lol)
30) When looking over your media library (books, movies, music, and video games) you notice that the majority of it is about the martial arts in one way or another.
31) You go around randomly hitting your hand on various objects for hand conditioning drills while out in public.
 
dcsma said:
28)
...

31) You go around randomly hitting your hand on various objects for hand conditioning drills while out in public.
Click to expand...

Oops, you saw me eh? :uhyeah:

32) When you catch yourself walking down the street and thinking, if the person approaching were to do such and such, I would use this technique to devastate them.
 
oftheherd1 said:
Oops, you saw me eh? :uhyeah:

32) When you catch yourself walking down the street and thinking, if the person approaching were to do such and such, I would use this technique to devastate them.
Click to expand...
I was wondering if that was you the other day doing that LOL. Now in number 32 I find myself in a given situation its a matter of how nice I wanna be that determines if they come away with a broken bone or if I just wanna toss them around and make themselves tire themselves out.
 
33). When out on the farm you find yourself using skip kicks to scar off the chickens ( this came from one of my students LOL) Though out on my farm don't have chickens but cows so it probably wouldn't work. Knowing my luck I'd take on that bull and the bull wins.
 
34) When you can read the previous 33 examples and get a sore neck from nodding at every single one.
 
35) You have a large collection of martial arts weapons but only know or have been train on only a couple of them. (Guilty)
 
36. You ever catch yourself supporting your arm and/or bowing when shaking hands in a non-TKD context.
37. You have trouble walking through doorways/openings without practicing hand technique combinations on it.
38. Your wife has a no sparring in the house rule for you and your kids, but you don't let it stop you when she's not around.
 
39. You own more than one type of tiger balm
40. Your car smells faintly of sweaty dobok but it's nothing a magic tree can't fix
41. You know more that 5 people with cruciate problems
42. You have cruciate problems
43. Three of your toenails are pretty much permanently black
44. You own stock in a sports tape manufacturer
45. It is impossible to do any kind of DIY task involving wood without ordering a bit too much accidentally on purpose

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