Romance, obsession and a weird suit over an alleged beat-down

Bill Mattocks

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Click the link to read the rest. Funny, sad, and weird. This is a story that just keeps on giving.

http://www.nashvillescene.com/2009-...n-and-a-weird-suit-over-an-alleged-beat-down/

Romance, obsession and a weird suit over an alleged beat-down

By P.J. Tobia

Published on February 25, 2009 at 10:17am

Tucked away in the corner of a strip mall off of Charlotte Pike is Martial Arts Inc., a self-defense school run by Chris Garland. There probably isn't another martial arts instructor like him in Nashville. Or for that matter, on this planet.
 
He kissed the bird to put it into the cage and it dropped dead on the bottom of the cage. Now he told others after the demo that the bird was simply unconscious. I'm like ******** but either way that's cruelity to animals.

A little too much chi on that pressure point knock out.
 
See ... that's why I don't live in Nashville. Too many kooks. Some of them are family ....
 
But wait, there's more. Sounds like a colorful character, to say the least.

Garland has also worked as a military contractor in Iraq, providing personal protection services for government officials, a hazardous and thankless job. And he's not only a gifted martial artist, but also a dazzling showman. Finally and most incredibly, Dolly Parton is a close friend of Garland's and even wrote a song about him called, "I'm Gonna Miss You."
Parton met Garland through his grandfather, Vassar Clements, a country fiddle legend. In an interview with CMT.com, Parton recalled Garland's trips to Afghanistan to conduct special training. "The first time he went over when the war first started, he said, 'I doubt that I'll ever come back from this, and so I want you to write a song and sing it at my funeral,' " Parton recalled. "And that made me very upset. Because I said, 'Don't talk like that. You're going to be coming back.' "
 
But wait, there's more. Sounds like a colorful character, to say the least.

Isn't it interesting? Even the news story, which seemed to be heavily into debunking him, had to admit that some of his stories are true and are amazing. How odd! Thanks for that link, this guy is just infinitely entertaining.
 
I just can't wait to miss all of these people! :rolleyes:
 
I don't know whether to laugh or cry...but I'm leaning towards LMAO!!! That guy is unbelievable! Rex Kwon Do for sure.
 
A Kobra Kai decendant for sure... probably plays those portions of the Karate kid repeatedly just for the occasional boost of inspirational from a real... masterrrrr. :asian:


:idunno: maybe he be good for those hard to discipline kids around the house...
 
Sometimes I wonder why people give me funny looks when I tell them I practice martial arts.

Then I read ridiculous stories like this and it all makes sense.

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futhermore! How do people like this even attract students. He sounds like a cult leader. People like this who spout off nonsense and can't back up their claims and have "secret" gov't missions always seem to have a hardy host of devout students. Why? Why go to him and not to a legitimate teacher who doesn't act like a crack pot and can teach you actual martial arts!?

To make up such stories and teach bad martial arts is a slap in the face of everything I stand for.
 
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People like this who spout off nonsense and can't back up their claims and have "secret" gov't missions always seem to have a hardy host of devout students. Why?

I'll tell you why ... People like this who actually believe themselves tend to be very charismatic. And as with any other cult, if you feel insignificant you're sucked into the company of "great men."

:barf:

We have a similar loose cannon in my community. He's a 3-time felon who's escaped the three-strikes law because of a bureaucratic error. They were all nonviolent crimes though, I'll give him that. He's a drug addict, outspoken racist, and notorious womanizer. He used to be an instructor, but now he just occasionally offers self-defense at a local women's homeless shelter - which is actually very enlightened if you can ignore the "notorious womanizer" part.

Of course, you don't have to stay within the MA scene to find people like these - they're everywhere.
 
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