I've Heard the Screams of the Vegetables!

Bill Mattocks

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The news story in the NYT below reminded me of the old Arrogant Worms song, "Carrot Juice is Murder" (video and link below). Enjoy your meat!

Sorry, Vegans: Brussels Sprouts Like to Live, Too

But before we cede the entire moral penthouse to “committed vegetarians” and “strong ethical vegans,” we might consider that plants no more aspire to being stir-fried in a wok than a hog aspires to being peppercorn-studded in my Christmas clay pot. This is not meant as a trite argument or a chuckled aside. Plants are lively and seek to keep it that way. The more that scientists learn about the complexity of plants — their keen sensitivity to the environment, the speed with which they react to changes in the environment, and the extraordinary number of tricks that plants will rally to fight off attackers and solicit help from afar — the more impressed researchers become, and the less easily we can dismiss plants as so much fiberfill backdrop, passive sunlight collectors on which deer, antelope and vegans can conveniently graze. It’s time for a green revolution, a reseeding of our stubborn animal minds.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/22/science/22angi.html?_r=1


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KmK0bZl4ILM&feature=related

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I like to hold the bag of carrots by the juicer and feed them in slowly one by one while the rest watch.
 
The problem is, it takes too long to first explain to each carrot my evil masterplan before blending.
 
The problem is, it takes too long to first explain to each carrot my evil masterplan before blending.

Ah, you're one of those supervillains who is easily compelled to monologue.


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You have no idea.....he goes on and on and on. I've heard villains commit suicide just to shut him up. :D
 
The carrots start rolling themselves off the counter hoping to plunge to thier death as they drop off the edge. Unfortunatly they just end up horribly bruised and broken as he begins the whole damn explaination over again. None ever survive to tell of the hell that is "The Kitchen".:vu::eek:
lori
 
Why am I picturing the "This is Sparta" scene from 300, but with carrots?
 
You can make little capes for them out of fruit roll ups. Or so I hear.
 
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