Dazed and confuse

[terryl965]

I was wondering how do you folks deal with being dazed & confuse about your Art versus other Art. Over forty years I have heard every argomeant over every aspect of these debate. This past weekend decussion over certain topics have me wondering if I have just hit the wall with training. I proud myself in teaching the best that I can possiblely teach and a couple of threads have me second guessing my abilities have this happen to you fine people on MT and if so how did you deal with it. I'll give a great example:
My 11 year son is a poom in TKD which is in are guidence to promote that way, I was ask can he take on a 250 lb man on PCP, the answer is no and not jist no but H*LL NO is he able to handle himself in Junior high and against most of the high school kids most likely. Now I'm not trying to justify my decission about his status or get into if it is right or wrong.

The main objective here is how do you deal withen yourself about desision you made when you get ask a question like the above one. I'm not a man that question alot I was tought you do as I say and when I'm done I'll explain. I"m trying to justify the above statement but can't.

So right now I'm complex inside.

Terry Lee Stoker

 

[arnisador]

My JKD instructor always says that anyone with 6 months of training should be able to handle a basic encounter. (The JKD has a lot of boxing in it so there is some merit to this,I suppose.) He says that we spend the rest of our time being ready to take on a 250 lb. biker on PCP--in other words, a trheat that is beyond just the common bully. I think everyone realizes there's some hyperbole in this and that no one can count on coming out on top in such an encounter--it'd usually take several cops to get such a person down, though for self-defense one need only escape--but it keeps the focus nicely on effective techniques that'd work for real.

It would be unreasonable to expect an 11 year old to do this--for all the physical reasons, plus the fact that someone that age would find it very difficult to maintain his or her composure in such a situation, which is a big part of the battle. But, is it a reasonable goal for a martial artist? I practice stick-fighting, not because I expect to be in a stick fight but because I really enjoy it. I do think training with the sticks has certain benefits for unarmed self-defense as well. Every art has its own goals. But for most martial arts, I think that if you're not developing confidence that you can defend yourself in a typical self-defense situation, then it is worth re-examining the art/instructor you've chosen and why.

I was mugged once by three guys. (This was 16 years ago, 2 weeks before my black belt test.) After about 2 minutes they got so frustrated with me still being up and successfully fighting them that one of them pulled a knife and stabbed at me. I blocked it, tossed them my wallet, and got out of there. (I'm simplifying the description here.) I want a martial art that gives me that.

When I gave the biker example, I was just quoting my instructor's example. I certainly didn't mean it as a challenge to you as a martial artist or to your judgment in promoting your son! Not every instructor I've had feels the same way as my JKD instructor, and it's not what I say when I teach. But, I do feel that a black belt should be able to defend himself or herself in typical situations--not extreme situations, but also not only against opponents chosen to match in size/skill/gender/age/etc. That's my opinion. I'd feel differently for a sport like Judo.

What to do? I can tell you waht i did. Years of karate left me with impressive dojo skills but I was unsure of my ability to use it in an actual fight. The live training of arnis was a help. The real fix: Cross-training and liveliness. Spend a few weeks at a BJJ school, or boxing gym, or something really different like that. Make sure it's somewhere where sparring of some sort will surely occur. See how you feel your art and training hold up! If you feel that these people have different strengths than yours but also have matching weaknesses and that you'd win about half the time, then I'd say that you're doing great! If not, you might learn something about how they're training that you can take back to your school.

Well, I hope I read your question right and that I haven't said anything offensive or insulting. I have no doubt that you're doing well--I just wanted to explain where my comment was coming from. Good luck!

 

[terryl965]

Arnisdaor I was not using your comment as a whole just as part and at my school we teavh hand striking one of my instructors was a striking coach for Pride and UFC, the main reason is I hope I'm not giving false hope to anybody especially my son's. TKD has help me developed my leg work for those stituation and I'm always open to cross training with other Arts like MMA or Boxing or Kempo or name any of them I was questioning if anybody else has ever second guessed themself and how did they handle it.
Thanks for your reply and by no means did I every feel offended by any of your statements: knowledge come's from all aspect of life and I'm on a life quest for knowledge.

Terry Lee Stoker

 

[Jonathan Randall]

Arnisdaor I was not using your comment as a whole just as part and at my school we teavh hand striking one of my instructors was a striking coach for Pride and UFC, the main reason is I hope I'm not giving false hope to anybody especially my son's.
Terry Lee Stoker

You are not giving a false sense of security to your son or your other students provided that you, as I suspect you do, make clear to them the limitations of UNARMED self-defence. No matter how good a person gets with empty hand techniques, they are still unarmed. There are no guarantees out there, even for UFC champions and senior masters with 50+ years in the arts. Anybody can be taken by surprise or assaulted in such a way that unarmed techniques cannot save them.

To the contrary, I think you have done your son a tremendous service. How many 11 year olds today have the drive and self-discipline that you have instilled in him?

 

[terryl965]

Thanks Johnathon for your input.
Terry

 

[Ceicei]

Terry,

You've always done what you felt was appropriate. There is no need to second-guess yourself now just because of what you've read. What others have are just that--their opinions--and should be considered with a grain of salt. There are many valuable voices out there, backed often by their own experiences. Ultimately, what comes down to the wire is how you feel is best for your family.

You've done very well with your son's training, and you will continue with that legacy as your teachings will remain with him.

Carry on!

- Ceicei

 

[Makalakumu]

As a teacher, I can say that it is good that you never stop questioning. This that go right should be noted. Things that go wrong, changed. Objectives grow over time. Being daze and confused in ones practice is a sign of growth.

 

[mantis]

i am on this forum because of this issue.
i wanted to ask 7starmantis about my school and art, and i wanted to learn about other arts.
I still did not makethe choice to commit to my art
and i am constantly looking at schools around at least to have some peace of mind and not have to question my art if i commit to it later on
btw, good topic... You have been bringing up really good stuff lately, keep it up

 

[terryl965]

Terry,

You've always done what you felt was appropriate. There is no need to second-guess yourself now just because of what you've read. What others have are just that--their opinions--and should be considered with a grain of salt. There are many valuable voices out there, backed often by their own experiences. Ultimately, what comes down to the wire is how you feel is best for your family.

You've done very well with your son's training, and you will continue with that legacy as your teachings will remain with him.

Carry on!

- Ceicei

Thanks CeiCei you are right in the above statement. Sometimes one must ask the stupid queston to get the right statement.
Terry

 

[terryl965]

I would really like to get more input from the masses on this subject not looking for judgement one way or another just honest opinion about if you have ever second guessed yourself. I would love to put some of this to paper so honest and good manners would be appreciated.

The origional question was have any of you ever second guess your judgement about a student you have promoted and if so how did you handle it?
Terry