R
rmcrobertson
Guest
So in listening to Prairie Home Companion do their Fall joke show, the President's name came up a few times. Here were the best jokes:
1. What's the difference between Vietnam and Iraq? George Bush had a plan to get out of Vietnam.
2. Hey, did you hear about the Bush plan for fixing the Social Security System? One word: influenza.
3. So George Bush dies and goes up to the Pearly Gates, where he meets God. God says, "Well George, nice to see you. Listen, I'm going to do something I don't always do, in return for your service on Earth. I'm going to let you choose: would you like to go to Heaven, or to Hell?
Bush says, "Why would I want to go to Hell??" and God says, "Well, I don't know, but I'm going to let you take a look around first."
So Bush looks down on Hell, and it looks great. Big golf courses, pools, great restaurants, happy people shopping. And he looks around at Heaven, and well, lots of sober people walking around, discussing art and religion and philosophy. People singing and strumming on harps in the Celestial Choir. Pretty boring.
Well, Bush thinks about this and hge turns to the Lord and he says, "You know, I never thought I'd say this, but you're right. Send me to hell."
So poof, he's in Hell. And it's horrible: people chained to flaming rocks, thrown into molten lava, demons everywhere.
He turns to the devil, and he says, "Hey, what happened to the golf courses? Where's the pool? the shopping, the happy folks?"
And the devil smiles and says, "That was just the campaign. Now that you actually voted for us..."
1. What's the difference between Vietnam and Iraq? George Bush had a plan to get out of Vietnam.
2. Hey, did you hear about the Bush plan for fixing the Social Security System? One word: influenza.
3. So George Bush dies and goes up to the Pearly Gates, where he meets God. God says, "Well George, nice to see you. Listen, I'm going to do something I don't always do, in return for your service on Earth. I'm going to let you choose: would you like to go to Heaven, or to Hell?
Bush says, "Why would I want to go to Hell??" and God says, "Well, I don't know, but I'm going to let you take a look around first."
So Bush looks down on Hell, and it looks great. Big golf courses, pools, great restaurants, happy people shopping. And he looks around at Heaven, and well, lots of sober people walking around, discussing art and religion and philosophy. People singing and strumming on harps in the Celestial Choir. Pretty boring.
Well, Bush thinks about this and hge turns to the Lord and he says, "You know, I never thought I'd say this, but you're right. Send me to hell."
So poof, he's in Hell. And it's horrible: people chained to flaming rocks, thrown into molten lava, demons everywhere.
He turns to the devil, and he says, "Hey, what happened to the golf courses? Where's the pool? the shopping, the happy folks?"
And the devil smiles and says, "That was just the campaign. Now that you actually voted for us..."
